Synopsis

In this riotous mansion comedy, a neurotic father and his ingenious daughter have managed to keep one very illegal family secret under wraps for years: a counterfeit printing press tucked away where no respectable houseguest should ever stumble upon it.

But when their carefully hidden operation teeters on the brink of discovery, they face a rather inconvenient choice: confess everything and risk prison, or create a spectacular distraction and hope no one notices the crime scene in the corner. Naturally, they choose the calm, sensible option — transforming their elegant mansion into a haunted manor.

What follows is a fast-moving comedy of cover-ups, panic, deception, and wildly questionable problem-solving. As their haunted-house scheme gathers steam, the mansion fills with an eccentric psychic, an unscrupulous design consultant, a geriatric love machine, and a quintessential Southern belle — each one adding a fresh layer of chaos to an already deeply unstable plan.

The more the family tries to keep the truth hidden, the more suspicious everything becomes. Secrets multiply, motives shift, and the line between clever disguise and complete disaster grows thinner by the minute. After all, nothing says “nothing to see here” quite like redecorating your mansion as a haunted attraction while counterfeit money lurks nearby.

Money Matters is a fast-paced, crowd-pleasing comedy for community theatres, dinner theatres, and companies looking for a balanced 3M/3F cast, one elegant and manageable mansion setting, eccentric character roles, supernatural misdirection, criminal secrets, and plenty of laugh-out-loud consequences. With its haunted-house twist, family panic, and stylish comic mayhem, this Parker Play proves that money may talk — but counterfeit money tends to scream.